Who says the meaning/purpose in my(and your?) life is "merely" "subjective" "arbitrary" "preference"? My meaning, all meaning, is part of the very fabric and essence of existence. And, I am, after all, existence itself. Claiming any of this is arbitrary, assumes that there could be some alternative way things could be - but this is nonsense. What is, is what is - end of story. No imaginary God could claim any greater.
It's kind of pathetic to see how self-denying...self-negating...most everyone is. Like a bunch of sick ascetics or something. Are you all gonna start whipping yourselves soon too? I suppose it's an outgrowth of social control. Now God's gone, society has had to fashion a new method to maintain control: the postmodern "that's only your opinion!" to keep people in line works nicely. The ultimate in low self-esteem is hammered into you - you can't even trust your own meaning, purpose, LIFE. Ha! No thanks - I retain my godhood.
Furthermore: egoism combined with empathy can combine to form something like Peter Singer's "Point of View of the Universe" - there need be no contradiction there. I feel your pain, and because I don't like being in pain I don't want you to be in pain. Simple. Empathy aligns with the apparent reality of other beings' capacity to feel pain/pleasure, making empathy an accurate, instinctual-level, representation/reflection of reality. Then, right = pleasure and wrong = pain. "Right" and "wrong" being more complex manifestations/representations of pleasure/pain.